A Library Of Living Life.

Wrapping up yet another semester. And it feels so great to almost be done. I have decided that the Winter Break is not long enough. I am always unprepared for the Spring semester. It is so hard to stay focused. Not to mention everything that has happened during this last semester. Falling out of love (YES I SAID FALLING OUT OF LOVE!!!), trying to hang on for dear life, trying to repair relationship with family, officially becoming single again, losing the man I love, slightly hitting a whore stage, going to parties where I am absolutely out of place, falling in Like, social interactions become hard again, drama drama drama, moving back into my parents house, feeling defeated, emotions getting the best of me and of course feeling the need to spend all my free time working out and getting my body back. It is going to be nice to take the summer off from social interaction with several people. It is time for an intervention. I feel the need to delete people off FB for a moral cleanse. As c...

Turning over yet another leaf tonight. I seem to be one of those people that allows their hopes to get up in all situations of life. School, work, Like, social interaction, finances. And what good has it done? Not a whole lot. I usually set myself up to fail, especially when it comes to, well everything. Ha ha, brilliant comment eh? I don't think I will ever be able to control whatever is going on inside this head of mine. I let my thoughts get carried away and I start believing what they say to me. Most of the time it is all made up twitterpatedness but when it is not the happiness it is often exactly the opposite, which tends to get me into trouble. The goal for this week is to just go with the flow. Stop allowing myself to feel things that potentially are not there. If they are there, then I will give myself 14 points.. for what, not exactly sure, but I will have 14 points somewhere. The idea is not to act upon any unintentional act, thought or remark, regardless of sobriety. A...

defeated.

This is the semester of ying and yang. Some how all the awful things that have taken place have all been balanced by the good. I am suprised, yet at the same time I was expecting it. The Bad: Breaking up with Jeffrey. The Good: Learning how strong I can be. Realizing that I do not need another person to give me happiness, I can be happy all on my own. Gaining independence, emotionally and socially. The Bad: Moving back home. The Good: Gaining a saving again. Becoming stable and realizing that I cannot just go spend money like a homo in Dolce and Gabbana. The Bad: Being quirky, ocassionally socially awkward and talking to strangers. The Good: Meeting Aaron, Erica, Tyler, and Joseph. Breaking into a new social group. Making Good friends. The Bad: Parting from the music department. It is time to start working on my own major. The Good: Parting from the music department. Generals are done, and I will begin to get deep into my own major. The Good: Beginning to bike again. Metabolism picks b...

I'm bringin' nerdy back! Them other Gays don't know how to act. I think it's hott that you've got a mac, So brush your teeth and remove that plack. Nerdy Boy! I see those glasses, baby I'm your guy. I'll let your calculate the root of pi. It's just that no one understands the shy. That is right world! I have curly hair once again! I am embracing the nerd that I am. Unfortunately the curly hair is not here to stay, it was only a temporary visit, but I am thinking it will return more often. I am nerdy in so many ways that I just need to embrace it. I have been trying lately to not let the inner nerd show. Afraid that being nerdy will make the guy I like, NOT like me. That I would be too much. Here I am world, Jacob Scott Diller and I like to jam on rollerskates, draw with chalk, do puzzles, sing karaoke, alphabetize books and movies, read up on cochlear implants and get really excited about the new technology, look at piano music and play through it in my ...

Okay, I know many people think that I should definitely NOT make this list, but I think it is high time to let myself know the things I am good at. I pretend to be awesome and like I absolutely adore myself, but I am like every other person. I let that little voice inside my head do more damage than good. Time to make a list of the things I am good at...and a couple things I like about myself. I put a lot of effort into what I want. I can listen to people. I am smart, and not just about a few things, I am really smart. I am good when it comes to remembering names, places, dates and dumb facts. I am a really happy person. I can see the bad in things. I am able to talk myself out of bad situations. I can stand up for myself and other people. I am a very interesting writer. I am willing to cry. I am a fast learner. I constantly want to improve. I have a very gorgeous smile. I am financially responsibly. I can have careless fun and can laugh at any situation. I understand that I do not kno...