I Just Got Lost On Wikipedia.
This month has been the craziest month by far. I didn't know that a person could feel so much at one time.
July has allowed me to eat again. I went grocery shopping and I was actually able to get enough food to sustain life. I am being financially responsible for everything. Never thought that day would come, but I am paying for everything. No longer relying of anyone to pay for anything. It is all me. Adult.
This month I have already met so many wonderful people. I am building up my friends again, after I committed social suicide. I have been brought back to life and realize that I can have friends that are true friends, non of the pretending garbage that I am used to. It is so weird to have people that SUPPORT me. Ha. Wow, never thought I would see the day that I could actually rely on people again.
The other day was absolutely ridiculous. Lakota and I hiked up to the pillars just to get out and look over the city. Relax. Conversation soon became heated. Which, if you know either Lakota or Me, we both have very strong opinions about pretty much everything. And the two of us usually end up looking at my life and what road I should take. Which road to follow... A st. J st. S st. ... If only I only had 27 streets to choose from, but to be more realistic I have about 50 Billion streets I could turn down. It seems that all the roads I take are either a dead end or come into a Cul-De-Sac. Life is so full of decisions and at some point I have to make a decision. If I were only graduated, it would be so much easier. ha. I came home from the Pillars, crawled into bed, and just cried. The site was one that only appears in the movies. Laying there with 7 pillows surrounding me, looking at photos, with red puffy eyes. Ha. I wish I could have seen myself. The tears were a mix of so much emotion. A spinning vortex of thoughts, and I am caught in the eye of it. I miss my family. My family in Denver, my family in Tucson, my family in Boise. I miss everything that I had not more then 7 months ago. Life seemed so simple and all in place. And crying about it all just made me feel so much better about everything. All the stress that has been piling up simple left, in the form of tears.
In the field of working, I have been surprisingly lucky. Especially lately. This morning, I went over to the Deleta and thought I would help Jackie get some of the weeds under control and help the Deleta look a little more appealing. As I was clocking out, Jackie just looked at me and said, "Well since no one else turned up, I'm gonna pay you your regular pay + $15 per hour. Thanks for helping." So basically, today I will be making over $100.00 just because all the other workers are losers and don't care to help. It is slightly sad at how dedicated I am to the Deleta. But my efforts are appreciated and I appreciate all that Art and Jackie do for me. I dunno how I lucked out to have such fabulous employers.
Well today I get a call from one of my employees, and I received his two weeks notice. I have no problem with my staff members quitting for another job. I actually hope a couple other employees would quit. It makes creating the schedule THAT much easier. Not having to worry about getting hours to yet another person. WELL that does mean that I will be hiring this fall...around August. I should be hiring about 5 to 9 people. I look forward to the hiring process. Interviews galore.
Also while doing some facelift work to the Deleta, I get stopped by a man and he askes if I do this work for a living (I am holding a weed wacker in one hand). I tell him nah, just doing some maintenance. Then he makes me an offer I probably shouldn't refuse. He says, "I have a yard about the size of this area you are weed wacking right now and I would pay you $100.00 to come by and take care of it for me by Friday." Well, obviously I take the job. It is an area that I could get finished in about 30 minutes TOPS. Woot, someone is looking after me, that's for sure.
Days like today, make me want life to be like a musical. I am listening to How To Succeed In Business Without Really Trying, and it is the Finale. The lyrics:
Now look here J. Pierpont Finch!! Have you lost your mind?!
Oh Rosemary Darling, Will you marry J. Pierpont Finch?
*Ding Ding, Bells*
Now I hear it. I hear it. I hear it!! Suddenly there is music in the sound of your name. J. Pierpont!
Rosemary, Just imagine if we kissed, what a crescendo!!
It just amazes me how everything can be going so wrong, but within 3 minutes and 47 seconds everything can turn around and the next thing you know people are getting married, claiming to hear music at the sound of someones name. Sheesh, did I grow up in the wrong world or what.
July has allowed me to eat again. I went grocery shopping and I was actually able to get enough food to sustain life. I am being financially responsible for everything. Never thought that day would come, but I am paying for everything. No longer relying of anyone to pay for anything. It is all me. Adult.
This month I have already met so many wonderful people. I am building up my friends again, after I committed social suicide. I have been brought back to life and realize that I can have friends that are true friends, non of the pretending garbage that I am used to. It is so weird to have people that SUPPORT me. Ha. Wow, never thought I would see the day that I could actually rely on people again.
The other day was absolutely ridiculous. Lakota and I hiked up to the pillars just to get out and look over the city. Relax. Conversation soon became heated. Which, if you know either Lakota or Me, we both have very strong opinions about pretty much everything. And the two of us usually end up looking at my life and what road I should take. Which road to follow... A st. J st. S st. ... If only I only had 27 streets to choose from, but to be more realistic I have about 50 Billion streets I could turn down. It seems that all the roads I take are either a dead end or come into a Cul-De-Sac. Life is so full of decisions and at some point I have to make a decision. If I were only graduated, it would be so much easier. ha. I came home from the Pillars, crawled into bed, and just cried. The site was one that only appears in the movies. Laying there with 7 pillows surrounding me, looking at photos, with red puffy eyes. Ha. I wish I could have seen myself. The tears were a mix of so much emotion. A spinning vortex of thoughts, and I am caught in the eye of it. I miss my family. My family in Denver, my family in Tucson, my family in Boise. I miss everything that I had not more then 7 months ago. Life seemed so simple and all in place. And crying about it all just made me feel so much better about everything. All the stress that has been piling up simple left, in the form of tears.
In the field of working, I have been surprisingly lucky. Especially lately. This morning, I went over to the Deleta and thought I would help Jackie get some of the weeds under control and help the Deleta look a little more appealing. As I was clocking out, Jackie just looked at me and said, "Well since no one else turned up, I'm gonna pay you your regular pay + $15 per hour. Thanks for helping." So basically, today I will be making over $100.00 just because all the other workers are losers and don't care to help. It is slightly sad at how dedicated I am to the Deleta. But my efforts are appreciated and I appreciate all that Art and Jackie do for me. I dunno how I lucked out to have such fabulous employers.
Well today I get a call from one of my employees, and I received his two weeks notice. I have no problem with my staff members quitting for another job. I actually hope a couple other employees would quit. It makes creating the schedule THAT much easier. Not having to worry about getting hours to yet another person. WELL that does mean that I will be hiring this fall...around August. I should be hiring about 5 to 9 people. I look forward to the hiring process. Interviews galore.
Also while doing some facelift work to the Deleta, I get stopped by a man and he askes if I do this work for a living (I am holding a weed wacker in one hand). I tell him nah, just doing some maintenance. Then he makes me an offer I probably shouldn't refuse. He says, "I have a yard about the size of this area you are weed wacking right now and I would pay you $100.00 to come by and take care of it for me by Friday." Well, obviously I take the job. It is an area that I could get finished in about 30 minutes TOPS. Woot, someone is looking after me, that's for sure.
Days like today, make me want life to be like a musical. I am listening to How To Succeed In Business Without Really Trying, and it is the Finale. The lyrics:
Now look here J. Pierpont Finch!! Have you lost your mind?!
Oh Rosemary Darling, Will you marry J. Pierpont Finch?
*Ding Ding, Bells*
Now I hear it. I hear it. I hear it!! Suddenly there is music in the sound of your name. J. Pierpont!
Rosemary, Just imagine if we kissed, what a crescendo!!
It just amazes me how everything can be going so wrong, but within 3 minutes and 47 seconds everything can turn around and the next thing you know people are getting married, claiming to hear music at the sound of someones name. Sheesh, did I grow up in the wrong world or what.
I want to live in a musical. Can we run off and make life into a musical somewhere?
ReplyDeleteYou know I use to want to live in a musical but then I realized I can't sing. That doesn't work out so well. I am glad everything is turning around and you're doing okay. I'm also sorry you had a what I call the break down moment. Mostly I'm sorry you had everything leading up to the break down moment. However just remember when life gets rough grab some sandpaper. hehehehehe
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