A Library Of Living Life.

Every time you think, I love you, I really believe you have to say it. If you think about holding their hand or kissing them, you do it.

It is that time again, the VMAs. This year I was slightly less than impressed with pretty much all of it. This year, there was no host...I would have rather had a single host or even a pair of hosts instead of the garbage this did this year. Who ever the opening guy was, (not worth remembering his name) was the most distasteful choice in a long time. His "funny" one-liners were anything but funny. Borderline offensive. Let's begin to review. Lady Gaga, or as she introduced herself, Jo Calderone. All good artists have those moments of disappointment. This was her moment. The idea was clever, but at the same time expected from the ongoing male accused female. My least favorite part of her act was when she was presenting Britney Spears with the Michael Jackson Video Vanguard Award. Yes Lady Gaga, you were born this way, but Britney didn't want to kiss you, so say eh. Pitbull and Ne-yo. Where to begin? Should we start with how Pitbull does not know how to move his ...

The first week of classes if finally over. Week two begins. I think I can handle this semester. I still have yet to get my head into studying again, but it will happen eventually. I know it's an awful way to think about it, but I would rather tell myself the truth instead of lie and tell myself that I will just dive right on in and study every day. I have done more than I thought though. I made flash cards for my Clinical Phonetics And Phonology class. Basically I am ahead in that class. I think tomorrow I will take out my planner and write in all the quizzes, then I'll write in all my assignments, and I could even write in what I should have read for each class and each day...okay wow I am getting ahead of myself. Baby steps. Let's just start with attending all classes. Deal. I can do that. The daily gym routine is back in order, well except for today...let's just say it has been a hectic morning. . . well hectic Saturday, Sunday and now Monday morning. Saturday I ...

A new addiction has been formed. I cannot get enough of Phase 10. There is something about this game that leaves me wanting more. It is my crack. I need it. I have to play everyday, even if it is just one phase. I play Phase 10, I dream Phase 10, I breathe Phase 10, I eat Phase 10. Phase 10. Is. My. Life (Thank you RJY for the idea). Top 3 Benefits: I thought my consecutive counting skills were good, they are AMAZING now. 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12 I know my colors like nobodies business. Green, Red, Yellow, Blue Gotten really good at Bluffin' ( with my muffin). World Poker Tour here I come. I can only see positive things about this addiction. It is already improving me. If anyone is up for a friendly game of Phase 10, you know where to find me.

Here I am sitting at ISU in the Student Union dreading going into the book store to see how much all my books are going to be this semester. Thank you baby Jesus for Gina Pretzer. She is definitely a money saver for me. Every semester she asks me what classes I am taking and then tells me "Oh I have that book! You can borrow it." I dunno how I could survive without this girl in my life. She is honestly such a blessing to me. I am terrified for the upcoming semester. I dunno how I am going to get through it. I hope that it will be nothing like last semester. I cried so many times last semester over the dumbest things. I got so frustrated that the only way to relieve my frustration was to cry. I resolve to not cry but handle the stress in a more Gay way... just workout. Ha. In no time, I will have washboard abs, pecks that can crack nuts (Edible nuts ya know, peanuts, cashews, almonds...etc.), biceps that only Germans and Russians have, not to mention buns of steel. Ha. Jusss...

only six more days of absolute freedom. things are starting to feel stressful. the roads are still under construction, and more people are moving back making it a lot harder to get places in record times. summer recap: hired on at american eagle, thank god because i need new clothes. got the apartment of my dreams. broke out of my dancing shell, and in turn i made so many new friends. reconnected with a best friend from the past. relationship with mom is building and we are accepting each other's differences. discovered my love for wikipedia. maintained a healthy weight ( fluxing between 155 and 160 ), no more of this trying to be as skinny as possible, not being able to see my ribs is more attractive. determined true happiness for myself. got a raise. learned to take other people's opinions into consideration, and actually consider them. do something out of the ordinary ( for me ) every day. traveled out of the state twice. participated in the gay community more :) success...

I am always reminded of Love, one way or another.

Okay, I am a reasonable guy right? I have been really great at staying calm in all situations lately. I don't actually remember the last time I got mad. Well today was definitely one of those days. Work. Working with 3 other employees today. One employee up in Laser Tag, another employee in the sound booth, where I was. I was there because I was playing a song off MY laptop. The other employee in the sound booth was there because..well he was the floor guard and he controls the music. Which leaves one last employee. If I am not mistaken, it is common knowledge that you don't leave the front door wide open without having an employee at least within eyesight. ALL our employees know this. There is ALWAYS supposed to be someone at the front watching the door. Next thing I know, there are three employees in the sound booth...wait. Who is watching the door? I ask the employee scheduled to work the front counter to please go back and watch the door, this song is almost over and I ...

Black light photo :] Last night I went skating after hours with a friend. I forget how great of a mood skating puts me in. Recently I have developed an addiction to Green Tea. Every morning around 9:00, I ride my bike over to Mocha Madness and get a 20 Ounce tea. I feel oddly cultured. It is one of those things that as a child, I would see on TV that I loved. The guy/girl that would go to the coffee shop, daily. It again makes me feel like I am not really in Pocatello. It seems like regularly going to a coffee shop only happens in larger cities...Seattle, or Denver.

4th grade, 1999, was the year I was introduced to the magical and mysterious world of Harry Potter. Mrs. Clark would read to the class for 20 minutes every Friday right after lunch as we finished any homework we had. Most of the time I was unable to focus long enough to complete or even make a dent in the homework I had accumulated. I was far too entranced with the story of The Boy Who Lived. I was instantly hooked. I admire J.K. Rowling's writing style. It is extremely vivid. Details like no other book out there. Harry Potter taught me more about love, family, friends, sacrifice, struggle, death, loss, pain, real happiness and courage than the public school system or my social life ever did. Growing up, all my friends shared the same values, the values taught to us by Harry and his friends. It is as if we grew up together, we actual friends. The movie is one of the best. At first I was furious with how one particular scene was done, but now that I have reread the book, and...

Lately my dreams have been so vivid and 3 dimensional. Everything in my dreams appears to be so real. I smell a persons smell. I can taste a kiss. I can feel the softest touch. It seems like while I am sleeping, someone plugs a USB cord from my laptop into my head and transfers all the images in my "Wish" folder. I guess Cinderella was right, "a dream is a wish your heart makes." Lemme share a couple of the images I have. Some photos are self-explanatory, others may not be so obvious. I dunno if I should call them "wishes," instead I will call them aspirations. Things I WILL aspire to.

While blog stalking some person in Missouri, inspiration struck! I am going to make a Red Velvet Cake, from scratch. *Gasp* *Gasp* *Gasp* *Whisper* *Gasp* "Oh my, from scratch" *Whisper* *whisper* "scratch" *gasp* Yes, from scratch :) Normally I am content with the Betty Crocker, boxed cake. But this time I thought I would outdo myself. So I found a recipe from The Pioneer Woman and started baking. I must say, I did a pretty damn good job. Delicious Red Velvet Cake from scratch, with a homemade cream cheese frosting, topped off with raspberries :) The kitchen is my new favorite room in my apartment. I have a feeling I will be spending even more time in there. Next challenge, The Tiered Cake.

honeSt miStakeS happen right? well i definitely think So. i waS out Shopping at the only Store open at 2 in the morning, walmart of courSe, and i decided i needed to get Some more underShirtS, Specifically tankS. moSey on over to the men'S Section and Skim the productS. pick out a package of SmallS. get the buy-five-get-one-free package, thinking i am actually getting a deal. come home throw the package of 6, not 5, but 6 tankS in my closet and paSS out. morning comeS, i go through out my day. experience my manic Stage, decide i Should leave my apartment to Save mySelf. muSt Shower. get out of Shower, dance around naked for a couple SongS, then get clotheS on. well i put on one of my new tankS and thiS iS what i experience... karma StrikeS again! it iS what i get for putting condomS in random people'S cart aS i walk paSt. Someone placed a package of boyS Small tankS in the adultS Small tankS Section. i Should have liStened to jeffrey when he Said never pick the firSt thing on...

*Knock knock knock* "It's open!" "Hey, what's happenin....Where are you?" "Kitchen, Not much just doing a little cleaning." "Ah, figured. I mean it is not every day you see some guy hanging out his apartment cleaning the windows in the middle of a rain storm." * -.- * I am definitely on one of those manic cleaning stages again. My apartment is so clean it is fit to house a Queen...wait :) No but seriously. Productivity is my middle name. Woke up and immediately went to my sisters house and mowed her lawn. Then went shopping. Doing a little retail therapy. It is one of those really important things that help keep me sane. After my little shopping adventures I came back home and then the crazy started. I dunno why or what causes it, but I get in this mood where I am super hyper, but feel high at the same time. Then while I am in this mood, I clean. No Clean is an understatement. I obsess until everything is immaculate. Windows, inside and o...

I am so addicted to Egg Salad Sandwiches. I dunno how healthy that is because they are made of eggs, mayo, mustard, and a few special item, but I can't tell you because then just ANYONE could make them as delicious as I do. BUT I mean I DO use LOW FAT Miracle Whip...so that counts for something right? And I DO use whole wheat bread instead of white bread. I just hope that my addiction will not do great damage. There is just something about these sandwiches that complete me. They have the perfect amount of zangy flavor. They might taste so good because I remember them tasting so amazing when I was a child. It could be one of those things where I remember it being so awesome years and years ago that when I have them now, I don't actually taste it, I just assume they taste just as good as my kinder years. Ha, oh great, I am crazy. I am putting sentimental value in a sandwich. No I am not crazy, they literally are THAT wonderful. I think it is time to cut up my American Eagle credi...